HSS: THE BLOG » Bumper Stickers

Real Men Watch Hockey

Mark — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 02:37:10 +0000

Bad back, wrecked knees, too many concussions, a complete loss of motivation; there’s a bunch of reasons many of us can’t get out there and knock heads anymore. But that doesn’t stop us from being part of the game. We can still butch it up from the La-Z-Boy. We could also drop some serious strategy on these guys, if they’d just listen to our screaming. “I’ll tell you what I would have done back in the day . . . Damn, guys, do not make me get up out of this chair! Hey, pass that plate of chicken wings, would ya?”

eBrush Design presents a new tongue-in-cheek design for Hockey Shirt Shop. One for the old warriors, the armchair playas, the sofa studs. Because we all know . . . Real Men Watch Hockey.
I even made a version for the football fans, too!

It’s Payday. Time to Deliver the Hockey Checks!

Mark — Fri, 11 Feb 2011 14:33:46 +0000

I think I got carried away again. Three different variations on the theme. But ya know, sometimes when I’m working on these designs, one approach clearly stands out. It’s pretty obvious. Other times, I like a couple approaches equally well. The wording might be slightly different and one not necessarily better than the other. I think that was the case here. So I decided to offer all three versions. These all look sick on any of the awesome t-shirts, mugs, neckties, and other gifts available from Hockey Shirt Shop and eBrush Design. The decision is yours. You choose the one you like best. But face it, we can all use a Payday!

Three New Hockey Gift Designs

Mark — Mon, 09 Aug 2010 20:04:01 +0000

Although two of these designs have been up on Hockey Shirt Shop for a few weeks, they weren’t given any love on the blog. So for those of you that don’t routinely check Hockey Shirt Shop for new designs, here are my latest efforts; “Red Ice“, “(Take The Shot) Rip The Net” and “Hockey: We Don’t Play With Balls“.

For Hockey Dudes that Dangle

Mark — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 13:34:35 +0000

It’s all about the dangle. We here at Hockey Shirt Shop understand this. Our eBrush Design collection of hockey t-shirts already has a few designs that promote the art of the dangle, as well as your personal dangleness. We’ve just added new color and shape options to our classic ‘iDangle‘ iPod parody design. And don’t forget the two dangle-ized definition designs, ‘disendangle’ and ‘endanglement‘. And, of course, there’s the fruits of your labor ‘Dangleberries’.
But four dangle designs, my friends, are simply not enough. Because we all know you really can’t overstate one’s dangleocity. So, allow me to present an eBrush Design creation for those with the sickest of all sticks – ‘The Danglemeister‘ – now available in admittedly way too many variations (I got a little carried away).

New Hockey Gift Designs

Mark — Sun, 30 May 2010 16:29:40 +0000

Guess it’s about time I post a couple new designs. I’ve been spending too much time watching the Stanley Cup playoffs and not enough time working Here are the latest creations from HockeyShirtShop. The first is the classic coach’s mantra ‘Put the Biscuit in the Basket’ and the second one is the declaration of dedication ‘Go Hard or Go Home’. I created versions of ‘Go Hard’ with and without a hockey stick. So it works for any sport.

If you’re a individual of few words, you might want to opt for a design I released a few weeks ago that pares that message down to a single word . . . ‘Hard’.

‘Crease Monkey’ hockey goalie t-shirt

Mark — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 19:34:44 +0000

I’m on a goalie roll. I’ve cooked up another design for our heavily-padded friends. On the heals of my last post, which introduced a new goalie design “My Goal” and rounded up all the others, I come up with yet another. I guess I should have waited. But isn’t that always the way it goes? You mop the floor an hour before your cocker spaniel pees on it?
Alrighty, then! Let me introduce you to “Crease Monkey”. It comes in three flavors; black, white and chrome, and on lots of great products.
“Crease Monkey” product link
For links to my other goalie-themed designs, click this link to my last post.

Ice Hockey Goalie T-shirts

Mark — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:24:55 +0000

God knows the goalies need some love. What a special breed they are, huh? Is there any position in any sport with more pressure on them than an ice hockey goalie?

One of my favorite all-time hockey quotes was by Jacques Plante, speaking on the matter of his occupation: “Goaltending is a normal job, sure. How would you like it in your job if every time you made a small mistake, a red light went on over your desk and 15,000 people stood up and yelled at you.”

I made a new goalie t-shirt this week. Actually, it’s a new graphic approach to a classic phrase that has appeared on many hockey t-shirts over the years; “My goal is to deny yours”. I should point out that I have made three other shirts specifically for the netminders. You might want to take a look at these. Odds are pretty good that there will be a night in the near future in which your special goalie will need something to cheer him up – something to remind him that he is THE MAN between the pipes.

Links below to designs in photo above.

Brick Wall Goalie “Bring It”

Iron Goalie

OMG “One Magnificent Goalie”

“My Goal is to Deny Yours”

Honda Hockey Parents Commercial

Mark — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 19:37:42 +0000

Like most folks, I used the commercial breaks during the Stanley Cup playoffs to answer the call of nature or grab some munchies for the next face-off. But there was one commercial that I watched almost every time it ran. Honda, which coincidentally has been my family’s vehicle of choice for many years, has picked NHL fans as a target group recently. They ran a wonderful spot about parents toting their hockey-playing kids around, through snow, in the wee hours of the morning – hours when there’s no one else on the road but truckers and hockey parents. It was a comfortably familiar commercial for those of us who intimately know the routine.

There are a few bumper stickers in the eBrush Design collection that go hand-in-hand with the spirit of this commercial – and perhaps just as comfortably familiar.

Hockey Taxi
(Endless Shift) Hockey Taxi
Driver Carries No Cash (Kid Plays Hockey)
I Have No Life (My Son Plays Hockey)
Caution: This Vehicle Makes Frequent Stops at Hockey Rinks
What’s Life Without Goals (Play Hockey)
Hockey ATM

Is your kid’s hockey taking over your life?

Mark — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 22:36:30 +0000

God knows where they come from, these chain emails that get passed along between us. I get a bunch of them from friends. Most of them suck. But every once in a while, there’s one that hits home. Here’s a cute one that I saved. I thought I’d share it with you.

IS YOUR KID’S HOCKEY TAKING OVER YOUR LIFE???

You base the next purchase of your new vehicle on whether it will hold six kids, six sticks, and six hockey bags.

You know the location of every Tim Horton’s within a 400 mile radius.

You relate directions to places by the nearest arena.

Knows every single kid on every single team your child has ever played on… But doesn’t have a clue who his school mates are.

You feel lost when you have a free weekend.

Your spouse waits until you decide where to sit and then chooses a spot on the opposite side of arena.
You become a partner in a skate sharpening business to save money.

Can justify complaining about someone who gives hundreds of hours of volunteer time to your son or daughter.
You ground your kids for a week (except for hockey practice).

Can rationalize spending $159 on a Synergy for a 9 year old but won’t spend $5 on a Birthday card for his wife.

When someone asks how old your children are you respond, “I have a ’94 and a ’97.”

Has had to use a grandparent to take kid #1 to a tournament because Dad was in a Different province with kid #2 at a tournament and Mom had kid #3 two provinces away in a 3rd tournament all in one weekend.

Has more miles on ’05 minivan than a ’66 Chevy.

Practices make up a very large part of your social life.

You buy gloves according to how loud you can clap in them.

You find yourself missing the parents of your child’s team mates during the off-season.

You refuse to make any plans with your friends until you check your kids’ hockey schedule.

Takes out a home loan to pay for all the equipment and expenses.

Plans birth of next child so he has a good hockey birthday.

New baby’s first word is Zamboni.

All computer passwords begin with “hockey” or contain child’s number.

Has been barred from more than one rink on more than one occasion.

Purchases new $135.00 stick because old one “didn’t have any goals left in it.”

Knows a few 5 year olds that are good but “lack focus”.

Has had kids ask if Christmas is “home or away”.

Asked to decide between try-out and first communion – asked church what his options were.

Received a letter from AAA Automobile Club and called for more info about tryouts.

See you at the rink!

And boy do I have a t-shirt that perfectly compliments this blog entry. Welcome to the ‘I Have No Life (my son plays hockey)’ collection!